what i wore: leaves know they're ending, celebrate their end

ah, the fall! so beautiful, and quickly coming to an end. i must post these pictures before the snow starts to fall! i don't know about where you guys are, but almost all of our leaves have fallen now here in beautiful québec city. early october is always peak season in ontario and quebec, and i had the chance to enjoy the beautiful colours when visiting my family for thanksgiving/indigenous day of resistance weekend at the beginning of the month.






this is my younger sister's wonderful dog, aspen. she is potentially my favourite four-legged creature on the entire planet, not gonna lie. look at my big goofy smile! how can you not love this dog?


and how can you not love the beautiful fall leaves?




if you're interested in that kind of thing...
dress: 1950s cotton day dress, vintage clothing fair in ottawa circa 2007 i believe?
crinoline underskirt: thrifted
necklace: key from the ste. foy flea market, 2$, chain thrifted ages ago
belt: from le vestiaire, free
oxblood heels: gift from my mother, naturalizer
goofy smile: thanks to my awesome sisters and an adorable puppy.

so with that out of the way, we can talk about more interesting things.

the folk festival de québec is in full swing as of tuesday and i am filled with musical love and lust. anne-marie, simon and i went to see ferriswheel and timber timbre, which was so lovely. timber timbre's music is always so perfect around this time of year, and it's always a treat to hear it live. there are so many shows i'd love to have time to check out, but my time and my pocketbook unfortunately will not permit such things. i do think i'll have to go see lisa bozikovic, though.

this beautiful song, no denial, is about the death of her mother, and features some of the most beautiful lyrics.

brilliant gold, crimson red/ the leaves know they're ending/and celebrate their end

i don't think i've ever heard a more beautiful metaphor for death.

inspiration: advanced style

this weekend, i was walking down la rue charest on a sunny afternoon, and an older woman caught my eye. she was a waitress leaning out of a window, speaking with a friend. her hair was bright white, except for a streak of neon pink and a dash of purple. on her left upper forearm, there was a small tattoo of a little unicorn's head in black and white. i was in awe. i find it so incredibly refreshing to see older women not get trapped into those boring "how to dress at 40, 50, and 60" scripts that all too many "women's magazines" promote, but at the same time can you blame those who do subscribe to that ideology?

just by taking a quick look at mainstream fashion magazines, we see that the message is overwhelming the same: you are either dressing too young or dressing too old, especially if you are over the age of 30. since you are no longer simply a sex object (with the assumption being that you are a hot sexual nubile young thing in your teens and twenties, but when you're in your thirties you are either a mother, wife, or career woman, or better yet all three!) then you're not really worth looking at or pandering to. advertisers will try and sell you the idea that if you buy our clothes, you will look as young as our models, you will relive your youth, etc. etc, because aging/being old is so completely horrible.

of course, there are exceptions to this boring sexist ageist script. every once in a while fashion magazines turn the attention on their own, like grace coddington, and the runway history makers like linda evangelista, naomi, and kate. but even while purporting to celebrate women of "all shapes and sizes," we all know this is a joke. even with articles hidden in the back, or one editorial that celebrates an actress or singer who is in her forties, older women are constantly being erased or worse, policed. year round, we see that their covers (think of elle, vogue, allure, etc.) feature almost exclusively women in their late teens and early twenties on their covers. the exception, of course, is made when they publish their "age" issue, which now shows skinny, blonde, white women in their 30s! how revolutionary.

gwyneth paltrow (37), uma thurman (38) and kate moss (34) grace the covers of the vogue "age" issues (age when they were on the cover)

but back to my love for the style of many older women i pass on the street, at thrift stores, at the grocery store. one of the main reasons i believe fashion magazines don't pay attention to older women on a regular basis is because they know most of them simply do not give a shit anymore. clearly this is not universally true, but for the most part i think it is easier for younger women to put all the emphasis on their appearance and to buy into the scripts fashion magazines sell them because they are the target audience. they are being pandered to, they see themselves, or at least someone they could aspire to look and/or dress like all the time so it is easier to buy into those illusions and fantasies. based on what many older women have told me, and the conversations i've had with them about fashion and clothing, you often have a better idea of what you want, like, and need which makes it all the more simple to not give a shit about what a fashion magazine has to say about your choices.

seeing this stylish woman this weekend was not the first time i have loved the style, demeanor, and fashion of a person twice, or perhaps even thrice my age, and it's a question that has been on my mind lately. my friend anne-marie has been expressing frustration at ageism in the fashion and beauty industry. around the same time, jezebel posted about a german magazine called brigitte which recently stopped using professional models, and now often posts the age of the "real" women participating in their photoshoots. last but not least, hellovagina was posting some amazing photos of stylish older ladies on their tumblr.

but honestly? the fashion blogging world isn't much better than the fashion magazine industry when it comes to representing older women. anyone who takes a quick glance at fashion bloggers will see that it is a relatively homogenous group; almost entirely white, mostly female, relatively thin (at least falling into the "straight" size category), able-bodied and young. 14 (including tavi) to about 30 years old, max. there are a lot of factors that could lead to this (it's a new technology, youth-target audience, etc), but i'll leave it at that seeing as this post is not about deconstructing fashion bloggers or even criticizing them. rather, i want to call attention to how, in some ways, the fashion blogosphere has created at least a small space for us to call attention to and celebrate stylish older women.

to cut to the chase, here are some pictures of some particularly stylish and savvy older women.

iris apfel

chantal thomas (loving everything except for the shoes)

lynn yaeger

mimi weddell

some photos from one of my favourite street fashion blogs, hel-looks.

Annikki

maritsa

hel-looks

all from hel-looks

and i even found some from a few of my favourite photographers:

photos by diane arbus

the critic, 1943 by wee gee

even the most recent CocoRosie video indulges my love:

as my wonderful friend iris says, "i don't plan on my twenties being my most fashionable decade."

the wonderful helen mirren.

but before i go, i want to make one thing particularly clear if i haven't already; i want to celebrate older ladies style, not police them. i feel like the only conversations we have about older women and their relationship to fashion is how to look more youthful, how to hide the fact that they are older, etc. but i like to think that most of the women whom i posted photos of are the kind of women who say fuck off to those rules. they are the ones who have gotten to a point where they simply do not give a fuck what a fashion magazine has to say about their choice of clothing, or their bodies, etc.

but don't let me have the final word! who are your favourite stylish older ladies? are your grandmothers particularly stylish? share photos! links!

my three all-time favourite stylish older ladies:

anna piagi

orlan

louise bourgeois

LINKS:

advanced style
the old ladies rebellion

oprah article on lynn yaeger

what a major ladymag looks like without professional models on jezebel

SHITTY LINKS:

are your clothes too "tween"? on the Tyra

what i wore: perfect july dance outfit

photos by simon dumas

these were taken near dolores de hidalgo, as liliana, simon and i made our way in search of the san luis potosi desert in early july. it was so much fun to stop and take pictures along the way of our trip, and i'll share more of my favourites on flickr and perhaps here in the near future.

as i was dancing to the music blaring from our little rental car in the middle of nowhere, mexico, i realized that this is potentially my absolute favourite dancing outfit. and i remembered the very first time i wore it: june 2008, at pride in toronto. i had just purchased the skirt from a vintage store across the street at a very discounted price, and hadn't quite found a good way to accessorize it. the day before pride, though, at my best friend morgan's encouragement, i decided to go with a semi-rainbow theme, even though i often find it a bit... ridiculous. sequins, glitter, boas, i can go for and wholeheartedly endorse. even rainbow suspenders, or belts, etc. but a whole rainbow outfit? i wasn't sure it would work. but! in fact it's really just four bright colours.

what to wear to pride is always a big conundrum. there are a whole host of factors a queer must take into consideration:

1. hotness, of course. and by hotness i mean you gotta be sexy. clearly this definition/requirement changes for everyone, depending on tastes (style wise and sex wise of course). looking sexy, however is not nearly as important as...
2. feeling sexy.
   
3. practicality. this goes extra if you're in the dyke march or any type of parade you've gotta prepare yourself for lots of walking... and that ain't so easy in your favourite pair of 4 inch heels.
4. weather. pride in toronto falls at the end of june or early july, which is usually when it just starts to get to that smoldering summer heat us canadians long for during our excessively long winters.
5. and, of course, there is the stereotype that gay men are the harshest fashion critics. are you going to dress for yourself, or for them? (my vote is always to dress for yourself)
   

for me, this was definitely my pick for best pride outfit. it was great for the heat (although i really wished my hair had been a few inches shorter), for dancing in the parade, for flirting with cute queers, for seeing friends i hadn't seen in months and even years, and last but not least topping off the night dancing to a free hidden cameras show.

while in mexico, i realized that i still love and wear that outfit that i first wore exactly two years ago! but, with my long hair and glasses, i feel like i look a lot different.

aa dress (yeah i know, gift from an ex) worn as strapless top
vintage circle skirt from king of kensington
(i lived on kensington ave. for 8 months and managed to buy this skirt and one other dress... an incredible feat considering my affection for vintage, the selection on the street, and the fact that i was actually flush with cash during that brief time in my life)
vintage shoes from st. vincent de paul, peterborough
leather satchel from value village, ste. foy
wooden necklace from now closed vintage store, montreal

with some lovely ex-peterboroughites, melissa and muna, taking a break from the heat at pride 2008, toronto

OMG J.D. SAMSON
this doesn't really have anything to do with this post or my outfit other than
OMG I MET J.D. SAMSON AND TOTALLY FANGIRLED

so tell me! what do you wear to pride events? do you have a favourite outfit that you first wore years ago and can see yourself wearing years from now?

what i wore: lucha libre

when we told pati, the housekeeper at la casa d'escritor in mexico city, that we were going on a date to the lucha libre, she exclaimed: "wearing THAT?!" i was wearing what i normally wear on a nice summer day; a simple red knee-length dress with white piping, and comfortable sandals. no no no, she insisted. i should wear a t-shirt and jeans.

ha! me, in a t-shirt and jeans. i thought...

why not.

for those of you who know me in person or have seen what outfits i have posted online... well, i am hardly a t-shirt and jeans kind of person. in fact, i do not and have not owned jeans in a good three or four years now. but my relationship to denim and pants is a whole other story... i scrambled through simon's closet and dug out two of my favourite of his clothing. seriously doubting my ample hips would be able to squeeze into his already skin-tight jeans, i gave it a go anyway. pairing it with his awesome "SCREAMING FLAMING OHMYGAW EAGLE" t-shirt, as we love to call it, a gift from a stylish belgian friend, i found i looked, in fact, quite badass.

and here is some proof.

photos by simon, edited by me.

honestly i've found many people's concerns about what i "should" and "should not" be wearing on the streets of one of the world's largest cities slightly exagerrated... but that said, i really did not end up spending much time in the city itself, and only went out by myself once. in fact, my experience with mexico city have really reminded me of people's reactions when i first moved to toronto: omg you can't ever go out by yourself/wearing that/in neighbourhood x/don't talk to strangers/etc. this is something i could really go on about at length but! another day, another time.

i have three days left in this wonderful country; tonight we are going to celebrate at los toros in colima, simon's favourite bar in the world. tomorrow, we are waking up early, packing a bus with food and friends, and celebrating our three year anniversary while playing in the waves of the pacific ocean. sunday, a goodbye party in mexico city. monday, we catch our flights back to québec city.

i know july has been slow here posting-wise, but believe you me i'll have LOTS to share with everyone in august, i promise.

self-portraits: characters/decay

a bad habit of mine i've been trying to change is actually sharing some of the thousands of photos i take. i still have ones from last fall i took with the explicit goal of sharing them here and other places online... but here they are, still stagnating and find ways to get lost on my harddrive. but not this time.

on my last day in quebec city before i head to mexico via toronto, i decided to sneak into an apartment in the midst of renovations with some tools of my own: vintage dresses, lingerie, jewelry and of course my trusty pentax. the canon rebel doing the photo taking is courtesy of my wonderful friend ben. here are a handful of the results... i'll upload a few more to flickr later.

also, off-topic: i'm looking for inspiration for a new layout. i still have a lot of love for the one susanna made for me, but i keep thinking back to why i made this blog in the first place... it's time for something more streamlined so you can easily see where else i post online, and an atmosphere that fosters more comments and discussions (i don't know about you guys, but i really dislike the way blogger handles comments and have been seriously considering moving to something more like wordpress). one of my main goals with this blog was to generate discussions and i often end up feeling like we don't get the chance to respond to one another individually.

aside from that aspect, aesthetically i'd really love something vintage inspired and classic, kind of like clevernettle, verhext, celine pinckers or katerina d'autremont. or perhaps i should just go the simple route and go for a nice header, something like cardboard sea has, or the wonderful nikki dekker. last but not least, what do you bloggers use for stat counter? i've been applying for guest blogging positions and things of the sort and the one i've been using for a month is not really cutting it. if anyone has any tips in this html department, suggestions of how to make or adapt your own layouts, your favourite blog layouts, etc, send me an email (juliacaron AT gmail DOT com) or leave a comment! sorry for all the technical boring discussions.

what i wore today: blossoming spring time

this is my new favourite dress. on tuesday my friend anne-marie and i hopped onto our bikes and rode for hours out to lebourgneuf, a suburb of québec city, to check out the new value village that had just opened. we found lots of lovely things but i ended up just getting this dress and she left with nothing because everything was absurdly overpriced. another reminder that value village is the "holt renfrew" of thrift stores and to support charity based ones rather than corporate bullshit ones, even if they are recycling.

i ended up shelling out the dough for this dress because it is quite unlike anything else i already have in my closet. at first, on the hanger, i thought it might be a bit school marmy, but thought to try it on anyway. on me, it feels like a dustbowl 1930s era dress. most of my dresses and skirts are knee-length but this one hits right between the ankle and knee and in fact, i think it makes me look even taller. it is perfectly floaty and airy for the lovely weather we've been having this week. i wore it when i worked at the thrift store yesterday and got lots of compliments on it.

after work i decided to go for another bike ride (may is bike month! i've been riding my bike every day) along la riviere st. charles on a lovely bike path which has gorgeous tress with pink blossoms right now. my allergies hate me but my soul feels better after laying under those trees. here are some more pictures.

my new favourite bag of all time. i found it outside the thrift store i work at, and added blue eyeshadow, eyeliner, nailpolish and lipstick to the young chaps. i am thinking about adding a monocle or a pipe to one of the two youngin's.

you can see my lonely bicycle in the upper right corner in this crooked one (the camera was propped on a tree branch)

but more generally speaking, things have been rough lately; i'm dealing with a lot of anxiety and other issues, and i'm realizing more and more as of late how fashion and clothing relates to this. i normally don't have a very hard time getting dressed in the morning (on average, it takes me all of 2 minutes to pick an outfit and put it on, ta-dam!) but lately i have been filled with anxiety and questions. i feel like there is nothing i want to wear, or that is appropriate. even though my closet is bursting, nothing feels right. i change three or four times before leaving the house to apply for jobs or interviews. what should i wear? i am handing out resumés at bars, how should i dress? at hotels, how should i dress? in retail, how should i dress? how should i wear my hair? should i wear makeup (which i normally very rarely do)? i am more concerned with how other people read me than how i present myself, and i feel like i am having a hard time knowing what people want to see.

there is a lot of power in that, in how you choose to present yourself. there are so many things in our lives we have no control of, but what we wear is something we actively choose every morning, whether we frame it as a choice or not. i think this idea relates to my self-portraits as well; i am the one deciding how to pose, what i look like, where to take the picture, when to take it, and whether or not the photo gets taken in the first place (since a lot of people dislike being photographed for any number of ((valid)) reasons). when getting dressed for others, there are very few ways to know for certain whether or not your appearance will please them. you can guess, but it is hard to know for sure, especially with strangers.

but hopefully i will find a good job soon and will feel less anxious and depressed. yesterday, as you can see, i decided to say fuck it and just wore what i felt like wearing and handed out five or six resumés and did a few follow-ups. if i try both routes (parading in a costume that is NOT me, and being myself) then i'm bound to find something.



but don't worry, i'm taking care of myself. cheering myself up by learning new old favourite songs on the ukulele, listening to lots of nina simone, abner jay, and old blues, drinking late night tea on my patio with karina, talking to old friends (thank goodness for skype) and spending more time on my bicycle than on the computer.

naked lady party

every spring, i purge my closet. spring 2010 is no different. there is currently a gigantic pile of clothes languishing in my office, longing to find new homes and new uses. so what's a gal to do? throw a naked lady party, of course! a week ago i announced it on facebook:

natalie, understandably confused by the title "naked lady party," asks: "what? a party with naked ladies... what do the prudes do, hide in the closets?" no no! it is a nude optional party! it is just a fun title for what most laypersons refer to as a "clothing exchange" or "clothing swap." the name "naked lady party" simply comes from the fact that during these clothing swaps, at any given moment, there is probably a lady or two who is in various states of undress while trying on new clothing. also, generally speaking it is a ladies-only event but that is debateable (especially in queer communities).

a naked lady party is a great occassion to invite all your friends together to get rid of clothing you no longer wear. it is free, and all the clothes go to a good home.

i follow these rules:

• if i haven't worn it in over a year, it goes.
• if it doesn't fit anymore, it goes.
• if i have planned on altering or mending it and it just haven't done it, it goes.
  
• if i like it and it fits but the colour is terrible on me, it goes.
  
• if it has never fit me in the first place and i just got it because it was cute and only a dollar, it goes.

of course, there are exceptions to the rule. i call them "the special vintage rules." these rules go for garments that are extra special and are more historical artifacts than they are simple pieces of clothing. for example, my prom dress, a 1910 tea dress, has only been worn five times in the seven years i've owned it. it is torn in the bust (in the fabric, not the seams, sadly). it no longer fits me. but it's a hundred year old tea dress. so it stays.

my sister justyne and i before ~prom~ in 2003

in the past few years, i moved quite often. every time i moved, i had to pack, so i also had to get rid of a lot of stuff. this usually meant calling my friends over to let them have their pick of the clothes i didn't want anymore the night before i left town. this made me quite popular in a lot of funny ways. it was a great way to make friends! everyone felt like i was giving them presents when really they were doing me a favour; taking away something i didn't need anymore, and giving it a new life and enjoyment. how lovely.

now, of course, this process is not without its regrets. there are certain dresses i still vividly remember (and sort of miss), and wish i had kept... or perhaps sold on etsy instead of giving them away for free. but this balances out when you organize a clothing exchange instead of being the only person to dole out the goods. you get good clothes from your friends, they get good clothes from you, and everyone walks away happy!

so before you throw your very own naked lady party, it is good to set your own ground rules.

rules:

• GUESTS: invite lots of people. in my experience, especially in the era of facebook invites, when twenty people tell you they are coming, maybe ten show up. tomorrow i'm expecting about eight people which is a good number. any more than a dozen can get a bit hectic.
• CLOTHING: put all of the clothing in a big pile in the middle of a big room. tell your guests where they can try stuff on if they aren't comfortable changing in front of friends.
  
• MIRROR: have a mirror handy! everyone wants to know how things look on them.
  
• if you host the party at your house, be sure to separate ANY clothing you might have second thoughts about giving away from the gigantic giveaway pile. it sucks having to tell a friend no, they can't have that when you see their eyes light up as they try on one of your favourite dresses that accidentally found its way into the pile.
• BE NICE: avoid body snark. for example, when someone tries on an old skirt of yours, don't say things like "oh yeah, of course that would look good on YOU, it totally doesn't fit my fat ass anymore." or even the opposite, like saying "here, try this on, it would fit you since you don't have boobs." avoid criticizing your own or your friend's bodies. just be conscious of your tone.
• DON'T FIGHT: if two (or even three) people want the same garment, don't argue. be civil. who needs it? who just wants it because they want it? be adults about the whole situation. it's not complicated.
  

so those are some basic guidelines!

when i was in montreal two weeks ago for the roller derby tournament, my friend anne-marie and i made our way to the wonderful st. emilie skillshare to check out their clothing swap.

here are some (bad) pictures i took while we were picking through the piles.

this awesome sequined garment hopefully found a good home.


my friend anne-marie got away with a cute little purse and a sweater, shown here.


i left with this AMAZING dress that made me feel like a princess. the people are the skillshare were also so wonderful and insisted i take it, even though i felt bad since i didn't bring anything to exchange! i got compliments on it all day.

happy naked lady parties! wish me luck tomorrow!